pondering a couple of "r" words

The first "r" word that's had a hold of me is resistance.  I've been considering it in the context of fear ... what am I afraid of, what do I resist, what makes my breath catch, what makes me want to curl into a small wretched ball?  I'm trying to see the big things and, with just as much determination, looking for the small ones.  I've bought two books by Steven Pressfield about resistance and doing the work it takes to push through that insidious barrier.  Insidious feels like a very strong word, but at this point in my journey, it feels like the right word.  I'm feeling a delicious resolve ... another good "r" word.  You know me and my visuals ... the one that comes to mind right now is, I've been slogging through thick mud for an eternity, I've just had a bit of a rest and am re-engaging with renewed vigor, anticipation and enthusiasm.  The mud seems to be thinning and I'm making progress, moving forward, excitement building.

The other big "r" word I just came across this morning and haven't had time to explore - reconciliation.  Turns out there's an astrological thing happening right now that I read about here, "Towards Reconciliation: Taurus New Moon."  What hit me straight away, for me right now at this moment in time, it's not about reconciliation with another person, but with a part of myself.  I want to re-read this blog post and do some more pondering.   

What I'm also noticing right this very moment, I've got a slew of things to do today and I'm watching the clock as I write this and thinking, "girl, you better get busy doing what you're s'posed to be doing!"  Thing is, this felt important.  So I'm just going with it.

Must say, I do like starting my day with good words to ponder.  Kind of puts a theme to the day, a bit more purpose added to my intentions.

Do you have words that drive or motivate you?
Do you have recurring themes in your lives?
Are there words that feel enormously important, but are like mercury, almost impossible to hold onto?
What's popping up on your radar? 
What feels absolutely necessary - right now?

blessings - kvk 

p.s.  the digital edition of Pressfield's new book, Do the Work is FREE on Amazon  - how cool is that?

call to arms

Hmmmm, maybe it should be call to, I don't know - gratitude or human kindness or equanimity.  Jonathan Field's current post examines this and it's an ongoing challenge for me and a lot of people I know ... how to operate a forward thinking, successful and heart based business in this world where the mean-spirited and underhanded is celebrated and emulated and held up to be the standard mode of operation.

I had lunch with the Thorntons today, Cynthia and Andrew, and of course we got around to talking business.  We've all been in the biz for a good while and got to swapping a few horror stories.  Lord mercy, the things we've seen.  Those stories got me to thinking - Why does it seem like the trend is towards the dark side?  That Darth Vadar has the upper hand and Obi Wan and Yoda are struggling.  Am I wrong or missing something?  Now, I have no delusions that the world will ever be all good or all bad.  I guess my main hope is that we might find our way to some kind of balance, no not balance.  I'd like to see it weighted towards the light, towards that equanimity.

So here's the challenge ...
  -  How can we shift the balance from dark to light?  
  -  Anyone have suggestions for new paths to blaze in the world of heart centered business?
  -  Anyone have ideas for subversive techniques?  For instance, I think the proliferation of yoga classes is an excellent subversive technique.  A good, solid yoga practice first changes you physically, but it ever so slowly changes you emotionally and spiritually ... very very sneaky that way.
  -  How do you stay focused, awake and aware?
  -  How do you avoid the intoxicating and alluring world of gossip and reality TV or would-be snarky friends - you know those black-hole people that live in a dreadful mean vacuum and want to suck you down with them?
  -  Can we be straightforward in our approach or does it call for being sneaky?  Hmmm, probably a combination.

Inquiring minds (me in particular) want to know!

I firmly believe in and make every effort to operate from a place of deep love and gratitude.  That's what I want to share, that's what I want people to feel about my work, that's really the only reason to do anything - spread the light.

One more thought - viral gratitude?

Wanna join the party?  Yeah, buddy - jump in ... the water's grand!

with deep gratitude and multitudes of blessings - kvk

p.s.  don't forget - these guys are doing it - the Daily Good: News that Inspires
p.p.s.  thanks to Cynthia and Andrew for the exceptional meal and inspiring conversation

vigilant me

It seems my life's theme over the last couple of weeks is vigilance: watchfulness; the process of paying close and continuous attention.  I've been working hard to take notice of all those little things that I tend to ignore and brush off with the thought of 'later'.  It's that ongoing feng shui-ing my life thing.   Moving through this process I just never know what's going to catch my attention.

This one amused me to no end ... I decided to finally, and I do mean finally, wash the canvas from my PMC tool kit.  This is the tool kit I bought either late '97 or early '98, one of the original PMC tool kits, and it has never, and I do mean never, been washed.  I'd kind of been enjoying it all nasty and crusty, layers and layers of lord knows what built up through the years.  But the other day I looked down and said "enough".  Behold the before ...

I won't say the result is pristine, but it's worlds better ... worlds!  Then I decided my work surface needed attention as well, so it got a good scrubbing.  Then I tossed the nasty little bit of oil-soaked foam (okay, so it was less than a year old) in my vintage PMC container (anyone remember those?).  It's quite refreshing to have a shiny and clean work surface and toolkit.  I probably won't wait another 12 years to clean up my tools.

I had to take a break from taking catalog and website pictures - it was making me crazy and I was getting really bored.  Beware of Kathy when she gets bored, she's been known to take on new and daunting projects.  But you see, I've been thinking about this one for years, and I do mean years.  I've decided to teach myself how to cast glass beads.  You see, it all started when I first saw this necklace ...

I had seen it in Ornament magazine ads and then it was in the Collectible Beads book that Robert Liu did in '95.  It was those chunky translucent blue and sea green beads that really got me - pate de verre - I had no idea what that was.  Funny thing about this necklace ... the maker is Laura Popenoe and she lives in Port Townsend and we got to be quite good friends while I was there.  Wouldn't you think I would have asked her about those beads?  Nope.  I have been thinking about emailing her and getting some pointers, but being the pig-headed sort that I am, I'm going to work on my own for a bit and see where I get.

I've bought a book ...

 

And what really got me going was my idea for molds - creative paperclay.  In the early days of PMC, core material for beads was a big problem.  For years I used paperclay, which was less than ideal but there weren't really any options.  So I knew that it would fire to 1650, not shrink and not burn up - it's the volcanic ash and talc.  After firing, I would just drop my beads in water and the paperclay would crumble and dissolve.  I thought it could be great for glass molds ...  the core for the center hole  made ahead of time, dried and stuck into little pinch pot molds - no bead release or worries about getting the bead out of the mold.  Plus they're very cute ...

Next, I discovered there's a rather large art glass supplier here in town.  I bought a few vials of ground up frit to experiment with ...

My first experiments have been less than stellar ...

But another one of those late night epiphanies has me trying something else - crushing up Roman glass and seeing what it does.  I'm not sure if this might be kind of sacrilegious, but I love the colors and I've got a bunch that's been sitting in a bin for ages, so what the heck.  My first attempts are cooling in the kiln as we speak ... that's the hardest part for me - waiting.  You have to wait until the kiln is bloody room temperature before you can open it!

 

I've also discovered that Rio Grande is selling glass supplies, who knew?  Ah, which leads me to another bit of house cleaning ... I just sent back all my silver scrap.  I cleared out a ton of old components and bits and pieces that had been sitting around forever.  I had a bunch of really early glass fired in PMC failed experiments.  I took a beefy pair of cutters and managed to extract most of the silver from the glass.  All that old stuff along with a lot of not so old stuff and with silver at $27 p/oz ... well it was a fine idea with excellent timing.  I got to do some much needed space clearing, get a nice chunk of trade-in credit, buy some regular materials but also order a nice assortment of frit for further experimentation. 

As I move forward to lord knows where, I'm back to that idea of vigilance ... staying awake and aware and heart centered.  To help with staying mindful, I've started getting the Daily Quotes from Abraham-Hicks.  I used to be a big follower, but I got kind of turned off from them for a while, they've gotten so commercial.  But I just decided that if the message resonates it doesn't matter where it's from.  An excerpt from today's quote did indeed resonate, "you cannot attract the presence of something wanted when predominantly aware of its absence." 

That's a tricky one ...

So much going on ... I'll keep you posted.
blessings - kvk

p.s.  it's almost my birthday month!!!!  wowie zowie, the downhill slide to fifty-five!

p.p.s.  270degrees is not room temperature ... drat