I'm finally seeing that for all those years when I felt like a poser, there was a small part of me that was in fact - posing. It wasn't blatant or overt or horribly in-your-face, but as I've been rewriting my Maker's Mark and Nuts & Bolts and my Etsy profile pages, I can see it in the way I'd written about my work and myself. Little phrases meant to impress or mask or appear more accomplished or sophisticated or just a bit more something. When I re-design anything, jewelry or websites or graphics, I don't call it done until I've gone back multiple times over several hours or a couple of days and look for those little niggling things that might have escaped my initial changes. Last night, I did a quick perusal of those updated pages and saw that I still had a bit more work ahead. I've spent this morning on further rewrites and I'm thinking I might be done.
And for an extra kick in the pants and a supercharged dose of clarity, I took some time to revisit the Gee's Bend Quilts.
There is nothing on this earth that moves me more than those quilts and the extraordinary women who made them. I first heard about the Quilters of Gee's Bend in 2003 on the CBS Sunday Morning Show. The Whitney had the quilts on display and the art magazines were writing about them and Martha Teichner did an inspired profile on that never to be forgotten morning show. I was floored, blown away, in tears and have yet to recover. Martha traveled with the quilters on their bus ride to NY, singing all the way and filmed them walking through the museum, voices raised in song and praise. I was overcome and I bet the Whitney has yet to recover as well.
To this day, I cannot speak of that video or the quilts without a lump in my throat and tears in my eyes. I didn't get to see that original exhibition, but I did get to see the second one in Tacoma ... one of the best birthday presents ever. Thankfully, when I walked in the gallery, there was a bench so I could sit down and compose myself before going in to finally see some of the quilts in person.
You see, the thing that gets me about those early quilts ... they are the truest, most genuine expressions of creativity I've ever encountered. For me, nothing compares. No pretense, no airs, light years away from hoity-toity. And that's the underlying goal for my work ... for whatever I do, whatever I write or create and put out into the universe, it must come from the deepest part of my heart and soul, free of pretense, to just be me and radiate.
From here on out, I need to keep them in mind. No more hoity-toity ... I'm over it, done, finished, kaput, fineto.
onward.
l i g a - kvk
I find your beautiful work and your down-to-earth attitude to be both approachable and inspiring at the same time. Thank you so much for sharing your work and your thoughts. You are truly an inspiration.
ReplyDeleteGoodness - so very appreciated and affirming. Thank you!
DeleteI don't think I would ever have thought of you as a poser. I do love the remake of your Makers philosophy, beautiful and lovely and very you. I've always found the Quilters of Gee's Bend so very inspiring in a very honest the way life is lived way. Only I had forgotten until you mention it and I thank you for that.
ReplyDeletePretty sure the 'poser' thing was all in my head ... followed by the urge to roll over like a puppy, be submissive and denigrate what I do. Nasty nasty habit. Old habits are hard to break, but I'm on a roll.
DeleteHooray! It's the one thing that kept me from entering the exhibition world as a 'professional artist' (oh that term!), the high-horse mentality where everyone tries to out-do each other as to what school they went to, the ideas they're 'exploring', how expensive their latest painting was to make...etc. Where I came from (art school), being an artist was about rummaging around in a skip for free wood and getting drunk at the gallery nights. And that's so much more fun! Yay for the salt-of-the-earth approach!
ReplyDeleteThanks Sparrow! Owning my own self ... not like I can own anything else, so not doing that is ludicrous and so destructive and wrong! I'm thinking I would have liked your art school ...
DeleteThe one thing that really stayed with me from that show was the quilt one of the women made from her deceased husbands clothes. The quilt was made from ALL his clothes. The depth of that type of poverty was something I never forgot.
ReplyDeleteThanks for this sweet nugget of a reminder - YES, it's the depth of poverty that makes the work so much more extraordinary. That's what makes the old quilts such an emotional experience, the new ones not so much.
DeleteIn fact I believe that blue one on the bottom is it.
ReplyDeleteI love "hoity-toity"! Haven't we all done that in an effort to fit in?
ReplyDeleteBravo to you for "owning it". Your jewelry speaks for itself and it says " I'm unique and incredible and gorgeous!
Thanks Mary! It feels like the those last thin layers of artifice are finally falling away ... so much joy!
DeletePretense and smug go hand in hand in the 'artsy world' of old. PUKE.
ReplyDeleteYou certainly don't strike me as guilty of either. Don't kick yourself. Your vision is excellent. Your work lovely.
Thank you so much! Looks like my efforts are succeeding!
Deleteyour changes are lovely. (the first long sentence runs away from the "I" a bit) I would put a period after Wabi-sabi, then start with I again. Watch for when you repeat exact phrases like "Lashing" as you move from on P to another. It repeats and that space can be cut or used differently.
ReplyDeletei love this quilt. if u are so moved by them, it would be really fascinating to see u make a piece of jewelry or a series based on that emotional link. I think anyway.
(look up the origin of h-toity . it too is a paradox of terms.
its all very normal to redefine ourselves, as we move through time, to come to our own re-vision, cutting off the burrs of what others have labeled us or etc...
blessings. keep shining
m - always such a good perspective! many blessings .....
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